Parallel Paths

Alan went to Minnesota on Wednesday to spend some quality time with Nathan, Briana, and Emmaline.  The quality time with Nathan consisted of watching ten hours of basketball Thursday and Friday as March Madness began.  He met Nathan's Webelos as well.  Briana didn't choose to participate in the basketball marathon, but had a few minutes to herself to go to the gym and work on her talk for Sunday.

Alan and Emmaline bonded by conversing in beet-a bott-a boo language which Alan said they shared back and forth. Emmaline also shared giggles and raspberries as part of her contribution to the conversation.  Mostly Alan enjoyed holding Emmaline, whether they were awake or asleep.

 Do eyes get bigger than this?

My week's path took me in a different direction.  I needed to stay in Utah to supervise students at the History Fair and to finish out the third term.  I also got to bond with our other two children.  Brian and I had dinner together on Wednesday night at his new Costa Vida in Clinton.  He shared great ideas with me about what he and Brandy have learned since they got married.  I can share this wisdom with Erik and Alicia.

Alicia and I spent a glorious day together on Friday.  I was excited all week because I was to attend Alicia's

geography class with her (her favorite college class of all time), and then we were to go shopping for wedding dresses--the best of two worlds.

I got to hear a lecture on Middle Earth--not really--Middle Asia.  Specifically, the professor spoke about Afghanistan.  It was a great hour--both of us taking notes furiously.  After class I told Alicia I was almost as excited  to go to the geography class as I was to go dress shopping.  She said she was equally as excited for both, so I admitted I was too. How could I be so lucky to have a daughter with enthusiasm for some of the same things as me?  We followed up class with walnut shrimp at Panda Express, another favorite we have in common.

Next it was on to wedding dresses.  I wondered how my daughter--who loves ponytails and no makeup--would like trying on fancy dresses.  In addition, neither Alicia nor I love to shop, so I wasn't sure how the afternoon would progress.  At the first store she tried on four dresses and two of them were beautiful on her.  Neither had lace, but one had a gigantic bow at the hip that was really cute.  We could have bought either one, but nothing felt perfect yet.

Briana said to be sure to try Veronica Michaels in Spanish Fork, so next we headed south.  Alicia told the shop owner she wanted something simple, white, and no fancy lace.  The woman gave her dresses like what she asked for, and then handed her an ivory-colored dress and suggested she try it on.

Alicia put the ivory dress on, and I couldn't figure out how to lace up the back, so the owner put Alicia in front of a big mirror and laced the back of the dress for her.  As she continued lacing the dress, it looked prettier and prettier.  It fit perfectly--like someone who knew Alicia's shape, style, and personality had made the dress just for her.  Alicia protested it was too fancy because the bodice and parts of the skirt were beaded, but as we took pictures and showed her I could tell she loved it.

We returned to the dressing room, and I asked if Alicia was ready to try on another dress.  She said, "No dress can ever match that one," and pointed to the one she had just tried on.  I asked if she wanted to buy it and she did.  After about 20 minutes in the shop, we bought the dress, and she will be beautiful on June 23.     

It's like the dress showed Alicia who she really is.  It brought out the beautiful young woman I've always known was inside.  Alicia met the person she has always been, but never knew was really there.  She was "dressing up" when she tried on the other dresses, but this dress was the "real Alicia."  It was a beautiful moment.

No pictures until June 23!

Planning Weddings and Celebrating Birthdays

Saturday was a crazy, but productive day.  We squeezed in the maximum possible activities into a relatively small piece of time.  Alicia, Erik (Alicia's finance), and I visited Eldredge Manor in Bountiful where Erik and Alicia will enjoy their wedding and luncheon.  We decided on a menu, took a tour, and planned the table decorations.  It will be a beautiful place for such a special day.

  Next we headed to Tooele to celebrate Maris' fourth birthday.  She enjoyed getting "beautified" with her four-year-old friends.  Painted nails, crimped hair, and fake tatoos.

The girls played games, giggled, opened presents, and had a great time.

After the birthday party we headed to West Point to meet with the wedding photographer, Jeff Hodges, my brother.  We had an hour to spare, so we thought we'd look at fabric for a quilt.  Alicia started out with brown and blue, and ended up with beautiful shades of red and green for a Christmas quilt.  I thought we'd have time to start getting ideas, but Alicia found fabric she loved.  It was all chosen in under an hour--and we got to Jeff's on time!  Erik and Alicia picked out some beautiful settings for future photos, and we ended out marathon wedding preparation day.  So many decisions, so little time.  Whew!

Erik and Alicia even found time for some nourishment at Maris' party.

She was never mine to keep

Twenty years ago, a little baby girl joined our family.  We had hoped for a girl to join our family.  We had prayed, gone to doctors, and we had waited.  My childbearing years were almost over, and I didn't know if I would win the race of getting pregnant before my time was up.  But wonder of wonder, miracles of miracles, I learned I was pregnant and this little baby joined two older brothers to complete our family.

She was  a delightful girl who won the hearts of her family with her cute smile and beautiful eyes.  We played together everyday.  We drew pictures and read stories, and then she grew older and started school.  Her world enlarged as she added friends to her circle.  She learned to read and write and roller blade.

She learned times tables, how to write a story.  She even learned to play the piano.  I was her teacher for a few years, then she enlarged her world and learned from other talented women.

Eventually her world enlarged even more as she attended junior high and high school.  She learned more about herself.  She learned she was smart and talented.  She continued to improve her musical talents as she played the piano and viola.  Each week we drove to piano lessons and talked and talked.  We became walking partners and talked and talked.  She read all kinds of books, and we discussed each one.

The time came to leave home.  She went away to college, changed her major at least once a month, learned how to live with roommates, and joined the workforce.  She became an adult.  She met a boy while working last summer, and they fell head over heels in love.  Last weekend my practical, mostly serious, daughter called, sounding giddy.  She announced she was engaged and planned to be married in June.  She could not keep her voice steady, it was so full of excitement.  She's ready to move on.  She is ready for the next step in her life, and she is moving there with excitement and determination.  

As for me, this is a bittersweet time.  All my life I have raised this "little girl" to become independent and to become successful as she moved out into the world, but this is my only daughter.  This is my youngest child.  This is my baby.  This is my friend.  This time makes me wonder how my mother felt as I walked away from her and into my new life with my husband.  I hardly had a thought for what I was leaving behind.  I was looking into the glorious future.  Did my mother mourn for the daughter that was moving away from her?  


Last Sunday we watched the 25th Anniversary of Les Miserable and my eyes flowed over with tears as Jean Val Jean sang, "She was never mine to keep."  So Alicia, move forward with happiness.  You were never mine to keep.  You are finding your destiny.  You have found love--a most precious treasure.  But remember, you and I will always be mother and daughter--eternal friends.